When reading this chapter, I could relate to the story of the woman who was harassed on the street by the man who said she had pretty eyes. I was in a gas station recently when the cashier asked me, in a very crude manner, how much I would charge him. There was another man standing by and he said nothing. He just called me a prostitute and bystanders are acting like they didn't hear him. When propositioned, we women are supposed to say, "I'm flattered, but no thank you." If we are not kind and gentle when declining their offers, we are unladylike.
Some women enjoy guys staring and whistling as they walk by. Others just seem to ignore it and accept that there is nothing they can do to change things. Whatever the reasons, women seem to have stopped demanding respect.
Heather
10 comments:
I agree with Heather that when it comes to men and women making crude unwanted comments to one another, acquaintence or stranger, it is wrong. However, there are people out there that can and do give compliments that are just observations to give that person a smile or whatever. My point is there are some people that are just trying to be nice.
I kinda feel like we all tend to go to the extremes on these issues. Yes guys can make unpleasant comments, but i know personally I don't take them lying down if they aren't coming from a friend just playing around with me. If a guy is seriously saying something crude towards me I'll go up to them and talk to them. I'm not a piece of meat so I don't act like one. If a guy is to far away to talk to I'll just give them a "your stupid" kinda look. It's annoying and its also annoying when girls complain and yet they do nothing. Sadly these days if you want respect you have to gain it.
The blog above is mine
-Kristin
Well right when I read this blog entry, I thought, "Why didn't the guy bystander say anything?" Where is etiquette and manners now? You see a girl being harassed, isn't one suppose to say "that's not how you treat a lady!"
Also, I know I've had my share of unwanted remarks given towards me, honestly I'm kind of afraid to stand up to him. Whoever gave it probably isn't scared to give another, probably even go on saying "rawr we have a fiesty one" and if he can say such crude remarks what can he do?
But it also makes me wonder why he would say such things in the first place. not saying you did dress like a prostitute, but maybe we should be careful of what we wear. I know some girls that dress pretty scandalous, yet they complain about unwanted remarks, but seriously you're asking for it.
I've had similar experiences. Many of which, spectators of the opposite sex have only helped in these cases. I think it depenends on the location. In my experience, the southern hopsitatily mind-set has an effect on men in this area. I feel much more secure being a woman in public alone here than I did in NYC. Men here seem shocked, appauled even, at the sight of men taunting young women. I think that in the city these types of incidences occur much more often. Therefore, they are regarded with a more blase attitude. There are more chivalrous men here looking to save a bell in distress.
--sara (forgot to claim it)
Joy... I do agree that if you don't want to be treated trashy, don't dress trashy. However, I was wearing khaki pants and a work tee that is three times too big for me. Sometimes it really doesn't matter what you wear.
- Heather
What? that isn't normal?..sadly that is what I thought at first. Of course that should never be ok, but what can we do? Kill it with kindness? That is what I always try to do anyways. As a waitress at a sports bar I get this kind of crap all the time, but they are customers and I am the employee so I can do absolutely nothing, plus I am working for tip so I actually have to laugh and smile and play along or I am down to my measely $2.15/hr. I feel as if I am encouraging this behavior when I have to do this, but then again I also don't want to look like the biggest WITCH ever when I try and stand up against it. I guess I have to just pick my battles, but seriously should we have to battle for respect?
The above comment is mine..sorry
-Chelle
Post a Comment